The Sum of 5
By Kevin Fletcher, CCIM
It has been said by many people in the past that we are the sum of the 5 closest people in our lives. Essentially, look at the 5 people that you spend the most time with and by nature, you will have adopted some of their traits or characteristics.
It hit me this morning with just how true that is.
I’ve struggled with exercise my entire life. As I reflect back on the times I dove deep into exercise or fitness, I realized that I was focused on a goal or a competition. In high school it was competitive track and field (field really, I was never much of a runner but I could throw things). In my 30’s, after my daughter was born, I saw a family photo and realized how much weight I had gained so I started exercising. Granted in the beginning I was faking it. I didn’t enjoy it, and maybe I was just “punishing myself” for the weight gain. I was just going through the motions until 3 of the people I worked out with (and was spending time with) convinced me to sign up for my first 10k road race. I signed up for the Trails to Ales 10k in Portland with them, and 4 weeks before the event, I went to the high school track and tried to run 2 miles. I had to stop every lap to walk, and I couldn’t run 2 miles without stopping. My legs cramped. I hurt and I was winded. I thought to myself: “ What did I get myself into?” But I pushed through the pain with my end goal in sight. I told myself that failing and incompletion was not an option. 28 days later, with the help of my friends, I ran the 10k (6.2 miles) in under 1 hour.
I pushed myself and I succeeded.
Here I am nearly 15 years later and I found myself hitting the same mental block again. I started exercising about 9 months ago, and I found myself “faking it” again. Did I fall into my previous pattern of mentally punishing myself for years of inactivity?
I’m eternally grateful for the love and support of my wife who had been training for 3 years at this point. Our closest friend was my trainer and with the two of them helping me and supporting me, I just kept at it. I also found myself surrounded by work colleagues who are also avid in their fitness journey. Without them even knowing, they were encouraging me as well.
My realization came this morning while surrounded by my wife, my friend and my work colleagues… I AM the sum of these five people in THIS area of my life.
The more we talked about their fitness goals, the more I found myself eager to exercise. Eager to train better. Eager to become a better version of myself. I WANTED to push myself and see what my limits are.
To my 5 people, I am truly grateful. They are a perfect example of what I mean when I say “the rising tide lifts ALL ships”. Sometimes it takes time, and sometimes we are faking it in the beginning. Embrace the suck and understand that it is okay… Rome wasn’t built in a day.
Now, this isn’t a fitness blog but I find that this story has meaning in all aspects of life. If you are not where you wish to be financially or professionally, maybe you should look around and see who you are spending the most of your time with. Are they feeding your goals or can you see that maybe they are holding you back? Can you find a support team that will help you achieve your goals? All of us at The Fletcher Group are here to help through an approach that is about the relationship, not the sale. I believe that when we help the person, establish the relationship and focus on that, the rest will follow.
We live in a wonderful era of technology and information. We are now able to surround ourselves with people greater than ourselves through Podcasts, Social Media, YouTube and Audible. You can now surround yourself with people that will lift you up and help you with your goals on your drive to work, or on your couch watching YouTube or while you are on the treadmill.
Consider the thought…who are the 5 people you spend the most time with, and are they helping you become the person you wish to be?